Not Well Done

Steak is a funny thing. Red meat, in general, has different temperatures you can conceivably cook it to. Unlike pork or chicken, there aren't health risks to a rare steak or burger. There do seem to be some emotional risks, though, for some reason.

There was an episode of King of the Hill, years ago, that covered this.

Now, I don't know that I'd actually ask someone to leave, but it hasn't happened with a steak yet. Over the years, there has been the odd friend or family member who has asked for a well done burger. Toss theirs in first, then get set for the rest of the people. Pull everyone else's burgers off and come back for the last couple later. 

If you're asking for well done, you have to tell me exactly how much you're going to eat. No one else is going to try and swallow one of those hockey pucks. My wife often refers to it as "killing it twice" and that doesn't feel far from accurate. 

Last night, we went to Outback Steakhouse. When we lived in Orange County, especially when Amanda was pregnant, we loved going to Outback. There isn't one that close to us here, so it's been a few years. However I noticed one between my wife's kitchen and home... so we went and filled a long ago craving. 

First off, yes, of course we got the Bloomin Onion. Silly question if you wondered. Violet, lover of steak like no other... got chicken fingers. I know. I, of course, got a nice steak. I asked for medium rare, which is just a good way to eat a steak.

Now, it's been a while since I've eaten out at any steakhouse. COVID changed things enough... steak just isn't a good takeout food. You need to eat it when it's ready. Of course, I forgot that you always order one level above what you wanted. I should have said medium.

This rare steaks comes out. Not how I normally eat a steak, but certainly enjoyable all the same. But half way through the meal, I needed to take Vi to the restroom. 

We're at the age where she really wants to go by herself, so I wait outside the ladies room door (and ask a female to open it so I can yell, "you alright Vi?!?" if I feel she's been there too long. Yeah, I'm sure that's not embarrassing at all. I'm a parent, job well done.)

Speaking of well done, I heard someone at a table nearby ask for their steak well done. My head snapped around just fast enough to see the waitress shudder. She covered it well, but I saw it. She wanted to ask the person to leave. I knew it.

That was my waitress too, and she'd been pretty good last night. When she brought the check, however, I might have added a couple more bucks to the tip because of how she handled the well done steak. No one should be so offended in their place of work, after all. Hazard pay.